Schools must go through a re-accreditation process every 1-6 years. This entails a visit from your friendly WASC committee, which thus far has meant a group of technophobic administrators who don’t know how to open e-mail attachments. I’m kidding, but also not.
WASC is visiting us next week. My boss, who is currently wearing a WASC stress-induced uniform of moccasins and legwarmers (?), has asked me to do a sweep of the school with “in-law” eyes. Meaning, pretend your in-laws are coming over and you have to hide all the weird stuff. What follows is our actual conversation.
Me: Well, there are a lot of cat-oriented things in this corner of the office. A cat stapler, cats wearing hats, etc. And a suspicious amount of muffin tins.
A: This office is like the collective insanity of four minds. It’s like if we all shared a dorm room. There’s troll dolls in here, for god’s sake!
Me: There is also a stapler that seems to be wearing an OJ Simpson-like glove. Creepy. Especially next to the old-lady cat collection.
A: Also…no.
Me: What?
A: Well…have you been back in the warehouse? There’s a poster of [whispers] Jim Morrison.
Me: …
A: …shirtless!
L: We could take a sharpie and give him a Bill Cosby sweater. Or a shirt made out of post-its.
A: There’s also…holes in the walls. Like where somebody punched them.
L: Well, it is technically the Arts and Music Annex. There’s a lot of angst in there.
